Death on Adventure!

Death on Adventure!

There have been seasons in this life when I’ve hated a man. As a Christian I did not love this man at the full capacity of how he should have been seen through the eyes of Christ. Sad to say, many times I fed him lies & told him he wasn’t good enough and even allowed others to say things like you can never be used by God, you are unusable in the body of Christ, untrustworthy and unfit, to be what God intended you to be. I’ve allowed him to be broken by others as if there was an association to the kind of brokenness that can only come at the foot of the cross and on so doing, allowed others to treat him disrespectfully. IAt the same time I watched him run through brick walls & battles for others who wouldn’t even stand for him. I couldn’t stop those individuals from abandoning him, and yet still witnessed him get up and stand like an earthen vessel with just enough cracks and flaws in it to allow some light out in a world where others needed what love he had left to offer despite how unqualified He thought he was. I also have stood paralyzed by fear while he fought battles in his mind, heart, and soul while he considered whether there was any value left in his life or even enough to keep it.

This man has messed up many times, because he still doesn’t always say or do the "right things". He has had a smart mouth, acted in prideful ways all while keeping secrets. He has scars... because he has a history. Some people love this man, some like him, and some people don't care for him at all. He has done some good in his life but he has also done enough bad that it haunts him, bringing condemnation from other and upon himself. He goes days without caring for himself. He very rarely gets dressed up to impress others yet, he is still optimistic, spontaneous, and loves to cut up. He will not pretend to be someone he is not but also wants to be liked. He is who he is. Every mistake, failure, trial, disappointment, success, joy, and achievement has made him the man he is today. You can love him or not. Take him or leave him. The one thing I do know of him is that if he loves you, he will do it with his whole heart, even to a fault, and he will make no apologies for the way he is about that.

Why was he this way? Why did he need to be put to death?

“Although he tried to fashion an identity of his own, he lived outside of his true identity as a child of God. PerpetualIy living as if the God to whom he was always attempting to return to - was demanding an explanation or reason for the opportunity of  His presence. He always thought of his Father’s love as conditional and he thought of any time spent in His presence as a place that he could never fully be sure of. So… While entertaining doubts about whether he would be truly welcome when he entered the place of presence, intimacy, and relationship, in his rightful home, and while always always looking at his spiritual journey as the fatiguing, long way around. The path he had been on was full of guilt about the past and worries about the future. Focussing on the realization of all of his failures and mistakes ultimately manifested itself in a false narrative that he had lost the dignity of his true Sonship. Unable to fully believe that where his failings were great, 'grace had always been greater,’ and still clinging to his sense of worthlessness, he projected for himself a place far below that which belongs to a fully adopted son until one day... I killed him!

That professed Christian was put to death at the foot of a cross and then resurrected with one who had paid the price for every sin past, present, and future!

The old man was now dead and now a new one lives! He has seen himself through the only lens that matters. The lens of Jesus! Now, this man is warrior. He’s not perfect but he has a lot of worth that can’t be taken away by other men! he’s unstoppable, well provisioned, gracefully broken but beautifully standing. He is loved. He has life. he is a picture of transformation, redemption and restoration. He is grace. He is brave, he fights for those who are weak and against the religious foe! This is the story of a man loved by God, who is now on an adventure, and the path of God. 

This is my story and I am that man I hated so vehemently. He is the man I killed. It was is me! I was a religious man, I killed him. Now my story, and the narrative has been redeemed and I am His, for Him, and In Him! This adventure ultimately brought me to my death but when you’re on the Path of Jesus, death is just the beginning of an epic adventure!  ​